No Motivation

I haven’t updated this thing in forever! Now here’s the part where I make up all these lame excuses for why. Bottom line I’m just not that interested anymore. I went back to regular schooling (I’m in class as we speak and my teacher is definitely glaring at me) and it’s been consuming most of my time. I still work part-time with my grandpa and I’ve lately become really into my story and Animal Crossing City Folk. Most addicting game ever made and also the dumbest. I mean who really gets a kick out of talking to animals and fishing all day? Apparently I do! so there are my excuses take them or leave them either way I could care less!

So Humiliated

My grandpa got a hold of my story and proceeded to humiliate me by showing it to everyone in the office! Ugh I don’t know why these things always happen to me. It was something I was trying to keep low key probably because my father, god rest his soul, never really liked that I was into writing. He always saw his only son as being some kind of macho athlete and well I think I disappointed him a lot when I chose not to pursue sports after my Freshman year of high school. Now they’re all trying to print copies afraid I’m going to take it down out of sheer embarrassment, but I like my story so much I’m not willing to part with it. Everything I wrote in that story is how I’ve felt at one point in my life or another and honestly it has consumed my life like anyone with a passion for writing. My gramps said he showed it to them because he’s proud of me and while I am a little annoyed by it, it makes me happy that finally someone accepts the fact that I am not an athlete. Sure I swam on the swim team, but nothing makes me feel more at home than to sit down in front of my computer and spill all my emotions into my characters. One girl even cried, but she cries at tv commercials too so its definitely not an ego booster, but its nice that my story made some sort of impact. O.k. Yeah I sound like a nut job I’m out!

She has no ass. How is she hot?

She has no ass. How is she hot?, originally uploaded by The Epileptic.

I was going through the pictures I had from our trip to Gonzales and I came across this picture I took of Paris Hilton’s picture they had up in Guess. I honestly never realized how flat assed she is. I for one find nothing even remotely attractive about this girl so I have no idea what all the hype is about. She’s also as dumb as a rock so yeah she’s just not my type what so ever. Plus I am happy I have a great girl who has her blonde moments, but she’s super smart. I guess the point of this entry is to say…there will be no Paris Hilton love for me anytime soon

You Complain To Much

I use to not care if people bitched and moaned all day about ever little ailment, but ever since I got diagnosed I’ve just had such a low tolerance for complaining. Especially when it’s people who complain about such stupid bullshit. “Oh my gosh I have high blood pressure because someone said something about me and it just made it sky rocket!” Well no duhhhh you moron! Whenever you get hyped up your blood pressure rises I mean are you really that into yourself that you think you’re the only human being on the planet with high blood pressure? It’s not like it just happens for no reason it happens because you can’t stay out of the drama and you stress yourself out. Same goes for people constantly complaining about stupid stuff like a runny nose or a toothache. Not to say my condition is better than theirs, but you need to live by the saying

There is always someone out there who has it worse off than you.

I try not to complain to much about my condition because I know there is someone out there who may be on their death bed and thank God it’s not me. Learn to not complain so much about the little things and save your complaints for something worth complaing about. God I said complaining a lot in this entry. Ha ha that was me complaining. Peace out!

WordPress You’re Addicting

I totally was not going to blog today. I had it set in my mind that tomorrow would be more interesting to blog about, but alas wordpress just sucked me in.  I just wanted to check my stats and while I was doing that I said “To hell with it.” and now here I am typing this completely pointless entry. Nothing much interesting happened today except that my grandpa knows this guy who breeds boa constrictor’s and he said he’d sell one to us. SWEET! Now the question is…what kind do we get. I never realized how many options I had until the guy started naming the different types he had. He actually does have one type I am very interested in called a Snow Boa which it’s basically a white boa constrictor. It’s actually albino, but I’m guessing it is just a lot lighter than some of the banana yellow albino boa’s you see around I saw some pictures he had, but they’re very very pricey. My grandpa said he’d sleep on it, but I am definitely getting one just maybe not that one. We will have to see. He suggested maybe an albino one, but their bright red / orangey eyes kind of freak me out a little. Nothing like waking up from a nap and seeing these two little eyes glaring you down. Ha ha. No thank you.

Something Amazing

I’m typing this on my iPod so bear with me. Lots of exciting things happened today. My little “sisters” were born which is bittersweet in the sense that we’re adopting them. Their mother wants nothing to do with them and she actually just up and walked out of the hospital just leaving them there. My grandma is with them now and despite the amount of drugs their mother ingested into her system they’re both healthy for the most part. Harper is the biggest weighing in at 5 lbs. 14 oz. and Emma is 5 lbs. even, but she’s having some trouble breathing so she’s in the N.I.C.U. They should me coming home in a few days. Technically they’re my adopted nieces but who cares. After I finished visiting I went home and there was a message on the answering machine from my friend asking if I could shoot some pictures of her this weekend in the French Quarter. I’m super stoked that she liked my photography enough that she’d personally call to ask. Right now I shoot with a Canon Rebel XT which is not top of the line but I love it. Speaking of love have I mentioned Cerena? Ah she’s just wonderful and I don’t think I’ve ever liked someone as much as her. She gives me butterflies. Today was just perfect to sum it up. I’m absolutely loving life today!

Why Am I Here?

Recently I was diagnosed with Juvenile Myoclonic Epilepsy. I was really depressed at first because it was a lot to deal with. I had to realize that while the medication they gave me does control my seizure’s it will not prevent them from happening 100%. After I had one of my more severe seizures at school I decided the best thing for me to do was to be home schooled and to reject all college acceptance letters from out of state colleges. I had to basically start all over again from scratch. Luckily for me I was accepted to a college close to home so my grandmother won’t have to worry too much about me having to drive long distances (recently there actually was a man who had a seizure while driving and his vehicle ran into a bunch of innocent tailgater’s) or being in a dorm room alone. Since starting my medication I have had no clonic-tonic seizures (formerly known as Grand-Mal seizures) though I do still experience what they call absence seizures every so often. With that being said I decided to start this journal to give me a place to write what’s on my mind. Sometimes I do feel very alone and I do tend to bottle up my emotions because I feel like no one really understands what goes on for me on a daily basis. This blog I am hoping will help me overcome that by trying to get everything off my chest so I can just live my life without worrying if anyone can comprehend my condition because it’s there in my blog. I understand me and I’m sure there are other people out there who do also. I want to be able to see that I am not alone and that everyone out there has their own issues that they deal with and that nobody’s life is perfect. Hopefully after a while I’ll be able to look back on this and draw some kind of strength from it, but only time will tell.