I Need A Vacation

2 more days and than I will be in Houston hanging out with people close to my own age. Thank you God! I also just got some illegal entertainment for the ride there, but we don’t need to discuss it. Let’s just say I really like it and I think they did great. Have fun figuring it out. Short update as I am trying to pack because I haven’t yet and mysteriously all my skinny jeans have disappeared. The evil grandma strikes again!

Happy Halloween

Gum, M&M’s, and American History X, originally uploaded by The Epileptic.

Also happy birthday to my grandpa who turns 61 today! I know he’s young than again I was one of those “out of wedlock” kids. Thanks mom and dad! I didn’t do much today my grandma took me out to Wal-Mart to get my grandpa a cake and I ended up picking up some things for myself. I got all my necessary survival items such as doublemint gum (the only gum I will allow in my mouth), Pink M&M’s to show that I support Breast Cancer Awareness Month (my mom died from cancer, but we’ll get into that later) and one of my favorite movies American History X so I was all set. I was having a nice day watching my rated R movie cause I’m 17 and I can do all that stuff until my little sister Baylie came home and than I had to turn the movie off. Bummer. My grandma actually watched it with me (she’s a holy roller so that was unusual) and when it came to the part where Edward Norton was banging some chick I kept looking at her to see her reaction, but she just sat there.

When I was in my Freshman year of high school my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer and had her right breast removed. We thought that would be the end of it and she actually went into remission until my Junior year and by that time the cancer was back and it had metastasized and ended up going to her brain. I don’t talk about it a lot for obvious reasons and I miss my mom very very much. Hopefully in my lifetime I’ll be able to actually see someone find the cure for cancer it would be bittersweet for me. Until then all I can do is just remember my mother and all the amazing times we had together.

Excuse Me!?

Ok so I’ll probably get a lot of flack for writing this, but at this point I don’t really care because I am super super pissed off. My grandma came to get me and take me out to lunch no big deal. We got into the turn lane and the light is already red so what was said next was just not necessary. This black girl walked out in front of our suv and said out loud “Stop WHITE bitch.” I don’t think I’ve ever jumped out of a vehicle as fast as I did then. I almost hit her with the car door and I mean I was after her. I’m 6′2 180 lbs. and she couldn’t have been more than 5′4 maybe 100 lbs I mean this girl was skinny. If it wasn’t for my grandma literally grabbing me and pulling me back into the car I would have knocked her out. Period. Girl or not I didn’t care. I just find it ironic that while they always call white people racist it’s o.k. for them to refer to our race and call us names. Why did it matter if my grandma was white or not? I for one am not racist by any means in fact when it comes to the use of the N word I am one that loathes the word. I hate everything about it, the meaning behind it, the way it sounds, just I hate that word and I have never used it. Today has made me less sympathetic towards most blacks, not all. We can’t hold an entire race accountable for a few ignorant assholes. Than some of them wonder why white people come up with such stereo-types well um hello! But like I said we can’t hold it against an entire race. I have friends who are black and they are all amazing wonderful people. It does, however, make me remember what Jarrell said to me once he said that blacks are way more racist than whites and this is coming from someone of their own race. Of course I’m sure a good majority of them will say he’s just trying to be white, but he is very proud to be black as he should be. People need to just wake up and stop whining about racism when they’re not really doing much themselves to fix it. Ok I’m done my rant I’m going to focus my attention on my Whopper it’s calling my name.